I've been a shit-hole('scuse my French) for almost two years. And lately I've kinda had an apiphany, think that's what they call it. I got over a guy, and I feel more comfortable around guys in general - I get on with them more. I'm pulling myself out of my hole, I feel happy for once. I wouldn't go as far to say optimistic. I still have no self-confidence, motivation or determination. And I'm still freaking out over my exams. But I'm only human two years of depression isn't going to go away over night. I'm trying. I want to reconcile with an old friend, I've gotten closer to some best friends who I never realised were aware that I was going through a lot. They could just tell but they didn't say anything. They waited 'till I went to them :')
However, one of them has recently fell into my illness, they are pushing me away without realising it and I want to tell them that even if they don't realise it, I do, and I am not going anywhere >.<
The other, although its only girl troubles, still refuses to tell me or let me help, I understand that but I don't think he realises how much I want to be there for him because he was there for me, he was my guardian angel I didn't know I had, so I'll be one for him :) a secret agent
I'm not writing this to make them feel bad about not telling me, just to let them know, if they read this, that I'll be patient. I'll wait for them to be ready, I'm not going to push you :) I know that people just need to know someone cares, even if that caring person can't help or doesn't know what's wrong, that they're there to catch them when they fall. I won't carry you across the finish line, I'll fix you up and heal your wounds so you can cross it yourself ^.^
Don't forget to smile x